Warning 4: Microsoft Publisher cannot handle bleed properly

If you don't know what bleed is, I don't have time to explain properly just now.

But, in a nutshell, it allows you to have pages where the pictures, backgrounds etc go right to the edge.  This is a basic publishing task which you would expect a program called 'Publisher' would be able to cope with.

You know that 50 page book I was talking about?

Have I designed it in Publisher? Yes I have.

Does it have pictures etc going to the edge? Yes, it does.

Do I have time for all this nonsense? No, I don't.

Time to listen to this song again, I think... 


(Edit: I have found a way to do this)

Warning 3: microsoft clipart is for personal use only

You may not use it for commercial purposes.

I have just designed a bunch of stuff using it. I will now need to see if I can find them all on stock sites and buy them.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrgggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Warning 2: making a pdf involves embedding fonts

Why does this matter? Because you can't embed otf fonts.

I have just designed 50 pages of a book with otf fonts (and others) used throughout. I need to pdf it to send to the printers.

Aaaaaarrrrrgggggghhhhh!!!!!!!

New free download

It's that time of year again, when children dress up in tea towels and dressing gowns to represent first century Jews (who wore neither tea towels nor dressing gowns).

As I was doing this anyway for a project, thought I'd post a simple, no-sew, historically accurate first century costume.

Could do with cloak-draping instructions too, but that will have to wait. Basically, wrap a bit of cloth round you for a cloak.

If you really want a hat, a beanie would probably be a bit more (very approximately!) accurate than a tea towel.

A girl can have the same costume ankle length. If she's depicting a married woman, she should cover her hair with a shawl.

Click picture to enlarge.

Warning: otf fonts cannot embed in Microsoft Office

You can only embed true type (ttf) fonts in programs such as Word or PowerPoint.

I didn't know that. I do now. I wish I had known sooner. 

Like, before I chose the fonts for a project. Or at least before I made all the PowerPoint presentations.

I designed the PowerPoint slides using Myriad Pro, which is the font used in the whole project, and is an otf font (I have no idea what the difference is).

I embedded the font, which means that whoever uses it will have the text appearing properly, even if they don't actually have Myriad Pro on their computer. Or I thought I had embedded the font. No helpful warning was given, such as 'You can't do this".

They were meant to look like this:

 Photograph ©iStockphoto.com/urbancow

  Fortunately, I decided to test it, by uninstalling the font on my computer, and opening the PowerPoint again. It should have looked the same. That's why I embedded the font. Instead, it looked like this:

 

Slight problem, I think! Some were even worse, with words overlapping. (The reason it's so odd is because each word is in a separate text box, and you click on them to make them disappear one by one, to teach the verse. And Arial, which it has changed it to, is wider than Myriad Pro).

Aaaarrrggghhhh!!!!!!

After a bit of looking, I did find a very similar font (Raldo RE), which will do for the PowerPoints. So, after three hours and £31.74 for a new font, we now have this:

Not bad, though I don't like the square full stops, and the word spacing isn't quite even in places now - hopefully no-one will notice, as I really don't have time...

Don't you just hate computers?

OK, rant over.

The problem with working for non profit organisations...

...is that you end up feeling guilty and unreasonable when asking for money. Even if it's very modest fee for the work. Rationally, I know this doesn't make sense.

Some helpful advice

You’re never as good as you think you are. And you’re never as bad as you think you are.

Gabe Bridwell

He's talking about making comics, but the advice is relevant to many things. 

Being a medium sized fish in a fairly small pond, I can easily be over-impressed with my outstanding talents ;-)

And then I look at the internet, or a book, and I despair!